Phoenix Tears
by AikenClay
Summary: It is the Marauders seventh year at Hogwarts filled with new professors and new excitement but when one student is told he could be a seerer things get out of hand. For one Marauder their seventh year could have been their last. Read and Review.
1. Default Chapter

**Category:** Dark/Angsty Fics categories.php?catid3&parentcatid3   
**Reviews:** reviews.php?sid8735&a1   
**Rating:** PG-13  
**Warnings:** MOL, NC  
**Summary:** _What would you do to protect your friends and what would you be willing to risk. There is a dark force creeping into Hogwarts Castle and things are starting to happen. When a new Professor shows up with a past unlike the others and a Divination professor who believes Remus could be a seerer what would you expect. It is the Marauders seventh year at Hogwarts and for one of them it could have almost been their last. Read the whole story here. Read and Review_

Pressures From Fitzgerald

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Disclaimer: If I had developed the Harry Potter characters, made up the plot lines, created Hogwarts, and published the books I would be really rich right now. Sadly I am not Jk Rowling no matter how many people said that I could have passed for her long lost daughter when I was reading a bio on her and they saw the cover picture. Of course since I am not JK Rowling you'll have to deal with this fanfiction instead. There are no dating romantic involvement between Lily Evans and Remus Lupin but I will drop a few instance where you may believe that every now and then just because I want to. This fanfiction will have Peter in it a lot more instead of a background character and a lot of marauders fighting after all it is there seventh year. I did create Delevay Richards, Natasha Fitzgerald, and Lillian Ace.

**With Great Power Comes Great Responsibility**

**Chapter One: Pressures From Fitzgerald**

_"Whenever there is a moment where you feel scared, and mind you there will be plenty of them, all you would have to do is close your eyes and listen to the soft tapping sound of rain trailing against your bedroom window. If there is nothing outside except a few drifting clouds, without a hint of sunshine inside you for that day, than you only have to reach your hand out until you feel the slight touch of the wind against your skin. Those are signs that your mother is watching over you and guiding you from harm. Those are signs that your mother is crying for you, her tears spelling out her feelings of missing her baby boy."_

"Professor Remus John Lupin would you please come crashing back to reality? If I wanted a twenty minute lecture about how our N.E.W.T scores were going to affect our future career as Aurors, I would have went straight to old McGonagall for a speech. Honestly, Remus, you need to sort out a special time for having some excitement in you life that is separate from your school work," muttered a scruffy Sirius Black while scratching the side of his head in an attempt to make his already untidy black hair appear even more windswept. Sirius had already handed his set of Defense Against the Dark Arts books over to Remus to hold so that he could make himself look more attractive to the countless female students at Hogwarts.

"These books are brand new, Sirius, and you insist on throwing them around as if they were worthless. If I had brand new books I would put them in a place where they would be safe, not thrown around like those muggle flying discs. Why do you always have your new things dented the first time that you use them?" Remus stated as he flipped over the front cover of a book on basic dueling training for recruiting Aurors. He bit his bottom lip when he shifted the books into a more movable position and examined the first page that had been covered in the names of a dozen Hogwarts girls. "Friends of yours that must know really well, Sirius, I assume."

"Shouldn't you be impressed by the number of names written on that list, Moony?" Sirius whined before pulling his hand away from his hair after a final touch up. He reached over for the five Defense Against the Dark Arts books that there new professor had assigned them to buy in Diagon Alley over the Summer holidays. Remus had been the only Marauder who had to buy his books second hand.

"I wouldn't be impressed by something as stupid as this list that you wrote, Sirius. I'd imagine that you have more of these names written on your other school books." Remus raised his eyebrows at his friend and rolled his amber colored eyes against his better judgment about wanting to know the answer that Sirius would come up with to his question. Sirius stuffed his school books into his bag, fighting with the books after they refused to fit in properly with his Potions books.

"You should realize, Moony, that I am very organized when it comes to my list. The ones that I have on the female population are separated into categories such as which ones are good looking, which actually have some form of intelligence, which are the best kissers, and which are the absolute worst. I also have a list that contains how many times I have to remind you to liven up, Remus." Sirius fumbled with the strap to his Hogwarts school bag for a few seconds before he was finally able to pull it over his shoulder. "You know Hogwarts should really limit the amount of school books that professors could assign for their seventh years."

"There is nothing wrong with me. I already have an organized time sheet that has a record on the times that I allow myself to have fun at Hogwarts." Remus spoke in his usual hoarse voice. He pulled the strap connecting to his school bag tighter to prevent it from slipping off of his shoulder and indicated that Sirius should do the same.

"Do you realize that you spend more hours pouring over rolls of parchment than James and I do combined? You have already made it through your first six years at Hogwarts without anybody except Severus knowing about your problem, and I see no point in you still trying to be normal by doing more than you already can." Sirius changed his tone of voice at the mention of Severus Snape and for good reason. He knew that Remus couldn't accept the fact that their enemy Severus Snape found out about his problem and that Sirius had been the reason for it. Remus paused for a moment, rigid, before shaking his head to clear his thoughts and continued walking toward their first Defense Against the Dark Arts class of the year.

"Do you mind not mentioning that name around me, Sirius?" Remus spoke in a voice quite unlike his own. The tone of voice he used was colder, bitter, and if Sirius didn't know better could have been poison. Remus straightened his tie when he finished speaking.

"How many times do you want me to apologize for accidentally telling Severus what you are? Does it matter to you that I have already punished myself enough for what happened and that James has already chewed me out because of it?" Sirius asked.

"Once you get to that number I will let you know." Remus whispered trying to control his bitter tone of voice.

"Should we change the subject? How about what our new Defense Against the Dark Arts professor might be like. Heard we had a younger professor this time straight out of that Defense Academy, so there is no way that she could be any more than twenty seven in age. Do you think she would mind that we are a little late for class?" Sirius asked while shrugging his shoulders at the idea of having another professor for their Defense class.

They had already had three other professors, all of which were male, that had never lasted more than two years at Hogwarts. The professor they had for their first two years at Hogwarts had been named Professor Addile, a timid wizard in fancy black robes. He had been a nervous wreck whenever he came around Remus when passing out papers and always assigned Remus extra work during the class. Their professor for their third and four year had been named Professor Harry Astrid, a stern wizard who had showed his students a cane that he would smack them over the heads with if they had gotten out of line. James and Sirius had been beaten quite a few times but it had never bothered them but when Remus started getting hit for reasons such as his hand writing was too small they decided to complain. Their final Defense Against the Dark Arts professor had been named Professor Bane, who didn't need to explain his rules for punishment. One toe out of line meant that you were humiliated during the last few moments of class. He once pulled Lily Evans to the front of the room and talked about what a pretty girl she was. When the bell rang the other Marauders pretended to be searching for something that they left behind when they overheard the Professor mentioning to Lily that she could come by his office at anytime if she needed help while looking below her eyes.

"Wouldn't be surprised if she gave us a detention," Remus said to his friend with a pleading look in his eyes, as if to say that they really didn't need another detention. Remus pulled his school bag off of his shoulder and held it against his chest. He scanned through the opening to double check that he still had all of his books. It was amazing how somebody could treasure something more when he had to buy them second hand.

"There is nothing wrong with getting a detention, Moony. You should enjoy every minute you have left of Hogwarts, even if that means cleaning up the Potions classroom." Sirius said throwing a sideways glance at his fellow Gryffindor. Remus slipped the handle of his fraying bag back over his shoulder.

"You would really want to receive a detention, Black. You shouldn't say things that you might regret." this voice had been one that both Marauders were hoping not to hear at that moment. Remus had been the first of them to spot the pale face, dotted with freckles on the bridge of a slightly crooked nose, of Lily Evans. Lily had her long copper colored red hair in a untidy braid behind her back.

"Lily, wouldn't mind cutting a guy a break would you? I was released from the Hospital Wing a few minutes ago." Remus explained to Lily the reason behind him being late to class. The newly appointed Head Girl raised her hand in the air to stop the flow of explanations.

"Ten points from Gryffindor for Sirius Black being late to class. I also have a message to give to Remus from Delevay Richards. She wants to see you after class is over. Follow me." Lily Evans snapped before heading off towards the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom with her fellow Gryffindors lagging behind her. Sirius rolled his gray eyes at her.

"Delevay Richards, she is that prefect seventh year Ravenclaw with the chestnut brown hair. Delevay is a great editor for the Hogwarts student paper but I didn't think she had enough brains in her head to pass her O.W.L exams with a high enough score to get into N.E.W.T level classes. Of course, Peter managed to slip in because of all the extra hours you spent tutoring him." Sirius muttered under his breath just loud enough for Remus to catch his words. Remus' face turned a slight shade of pink at the mention of Delevay Richards that he hoped Sirius didn't notice before he turned his attention towards the ground as they walked.

_"Hard to believe that the next time I might see you will be when you are grown up in more ways than one. Promise me that you are going to grow up being somebody who would set an example for other people to follow. Remember that when you hear the rain that is me telling you that I miss you."_

The Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom was dimly lit, casting shadows against parts of the walls that weren't already covered in moving pictures of dueling wizards and growling creatures, and an unusual silence filled the area. In the center of the classroom stood an abnormally thin bony woman with her dirty blond hair thrown carelessly behind her. Her cold silver eyes, controlling the level of noise in her class, scanned the faces of the awaiting students while searching the faces of Sirius and Remus as Lily went to take her seat near the professor's desk. Above the professors desk was a poster of a wizard with pointed eyebrows, cruel silver eyes, and an arched mouth sneering at the students who waited for their lesson. Remus placed his school bag in the seat beside Peter while Sirius placed his bag in the row in front of Peter and watched as James Potter pushed it towards him.

"Do you students care to tell me your reasons for being late and your names," sneered the professor who had decided to lean over the front of her desk. Sirius grinned at the professor, who couldn't have been more than ten years older than the Marauders themselves.

"Professor, the reason that I am late to class is simply because I didn't want to attend. My name is Sirius Black by the way and you would be a fool to forget it." Sirius announced loud enough for almost every student, except Lily who frowned, to exchange glances and try their best not to start laughing.

"My name is Remus Lupin and I was released from the Hospital Wing a few minutes before I arrived here." Remus explained but instead of their professor motioning for them to take their seats, or lecturing them about the importance of being on time, the professor stood up straight in front of her class and lowered her eyes at Remus. A small pain formed in Remus' right arm where he knew his werewolf bite was.

"You should be aware, Lupin, that you are to say Professor Fitzgerald before you even start the rest of your sentence. You may take your seat, Black, as I have no use for you but I want your friend to sit up beside Miss Evans where I can keep an eye on him." Remus grabbed his bag from his seat, lowering his eyes to the floor once again to escape the stares of other students, and made his way beside where Lily Evans sat. "As I was saying, we have no record of your last assignment so we will start with the topic on how to recognize a werewolf in _his_ human form. What do you want, Lupin?" Natasha Fitzgerald stared at the face of the first student who questioned her.

"We had just finished the Unforgivable Curses during our last Defense Against the Dark Arts class, and we were due to start basic Auror training..."

"Wouldn't it be the right thing to do to let the Professor teach the class, Lupin? Did I say that you had any permission to speak in this class? Did I? No, we are going to learn how to recognize werewolves because you might already being _sitting_ next to one and not even know it. The Ministry would want you to know what some of us already see. There are three types of werewolves which are the regular Werewolf, the Feral Werewolf, and the werewolf that decides to go feral. Lupin, please describe these types of werewolves for the class." Professor Fitzgerald spoke clear enough that a few students wondered why she was picking on Remus.

"Regular werewolves have no choice in whether they turn into one or not while a Feral Werewolves changes into the werewolf state a mind when they are in their human form by accident. Werewolves that decide to turn feral on purpose want to gain a sense of power." Remus said without raising his eyes to meet hers.

"Somebody has been doing their homework. Five points from Gryffindor for not meeting my eyes. Why should a feral incident be reported to the Ministry of Magic and what could happen to the werewolf in question? Evans?"

"Feral accidents should be reported because it could present a sense of danger for anybody within the werewolf at the time, which could lead to a trial where the werewolf in question could be brought in on charges enough to send them to Azkaban."

"Lupin, since you should know a lot about the Unforgivable Curses you should explain why they do not work properly on werewolves."

"Unforgivable Curses such as the Imperius Curse does not work properly because the werewolf state of mind is strong enough to block out the voices of the curse user. Werewolves have a much higher tolerance to pain when it comes to the other curse that causes pain."

"Lupin, please meet my eyes when you talk. Now I want you all to write two rolls of parchment, to be handed in today, on how to recognize symptoms of a werewolf and describe them. Some that you may use are constant sickness, weakness around the time of the full moon, and drowsiness." Natasha Fitzgerald went to take her seat at her desk before writing notes on a spare bit of parchment. She paused the tip of her quill. "Lupin, you will see me after class," she said in her most bitter voice.


	2. Drowning

Authors Note: Knowing that most people dread the authors note, I am going to explain a few things about the last chapter. You might be wondering why Remus was spacing out about two times during the chapter, but I am not going to tell you anything about that except it does have to do with his past. He deals more with his past in this chapter but I am still going to try and keep parts a secret until later on.

b Azkaban Must Be A Nice Place To Visit /b 

b Chapter Two: Drowning /b 

In the silence that filled the Defense Against the Dark Arts classroom, students could not have welcomed the ringing of the bell even more. Head Girl Lily Evans collected her essay on identifying werewolves, consisting of no less than six rolls of parchment, and placed it on the growing pile on Professor Fitzgerald's desk. Peter replaced the cap on his bottle of ink, frowning slightly at the half finished essay on his desk. Sirius, rising slowly from his seat, exchanged a worried glance with James who had not bothered doing his essay. Remus, who had regained his calm composure, remained seated in his two person desk waiting for the other Marauders to file out.

"Wouldn't have expected Albus Dumbledore to allow a werewolf to continue learning at Hogwarts, especially after what had happened between you and a Slytherin student by the name of Severus Snape. Dumbledore, however, has been known to take pity on half-breeds while the rest of us in the Wizarding world wouldn't even give your kind a chance. Do you know what would happen to a werewolf if he were to bite a fellow student?" Professor Fitzgerald tossed her dirty blonde hair behind her shoulders, a sly grin creeping across her bony face. Something around her pointed nose reminded Remus of the rat that his friend Peter Pettigrew transformed into around the time of the full moon.

"I suppose that werewolf would have to be sent to Azkaban prison." Remus' throat started to close up while his eyes began to water, but not wanting her to realize the changes he manages to whisper his words. Professor Fitzgerald leaned her face close to Remus', their eyes met and an instant pain jabbed at Remus.

"Azkaban must be a nice place to visit, but I wouldn't know seeing how I know nobody who would be foolish enough to do something worthy of being sent there. Do you know somebody who would be stupid enough to willingly trade places with a guilty person? I suppose it would torture that guilty person knowing that they had sent somebody they loved to a place as bad as Azkaban, with nothing but bars on their cells and dementors to pass by them every night. Having somebody decide their fate about whether they would spend a few years, a lifetime, or have to go through having the dementors kiss preformed on them." Professor Fitzgerald chose her words carefully, selecting what she felt best to cause guilty emotions in Remus. Natasha saw the weakness flicker in his eyes, saw the lack of barrier between the two of them, and moved her face even closer so that their noses were no more than an inch apart, talking directly to his face so that he wouldn't have time to think.

"Do you know what they do to people in Azkaban, Lupin? Being in Azkaban must be worse than receiving a beating from somebody because at least you have a chance of surviving when you are hit. When you are in Azkaban prison, all you want is to become more depressed with each passing day. You have nothing while you are in Azkaban. There is no hope at ever seeing your loved ones again. When you get out, if you get out that is, it would be as if you are a stranger to the people you once knew. Remember that, Lupin, for if you keep heading the way you are going after the encounter with Severus than Azkaban would be your fate. You may leave, Lupin." Remus wondered if the lights had dimmed while Professor Fitzgerald had been speaking, their had seemed to be more eerie shadows on the walls. Natasha Fitzgerald raised her hand inches from the side of the students' face and then slammed it across the side of his face. "You'll survive." she said before walking to her desk to finish gathering her belongings before she headed out of the classroom door towards the Great Hall for lunch.

Out of habit Remus rubbed the spot of his face where he felt the familiar warmth spreading from a wound. He examined his hand and saw spots of blood covering the tips of his fingers, but that had not been what had sent his heart pounding.

Streaming water descended from his rounded shoulders, running down the front of his chest, before splashing into the bottom of the shower. Remus had no idea whether he had been in the shower for minutes or hours, but he was at the point where it didn't really matter to him. Strands of light brown hair, some of gray, flopped in front of his eyes and he had no choice but to push it away. At that moment he wanted to almost drown, after all in a sense he was already drowning. After the conversation with Fitzgerald he felt himself slip into the old methods of survival he had learned growing up, and also the familiar emotions that went along with it. Remus knew that he was slipping, being dragged down by something that would not bother to let him go, perhaps a part of him that regretted everything that he had done in the past. Had he been the cause of his parents misery?

i "Do you know what they do to people in Azkaban, Lupin?"

Remus stepped out of the shower cubicle with a towel tied around him. He stood in front of the bathroom mirror and examined his face in the reflective glass. Under his right eye had been a puffy area where he had been slapped, but he supposed that nobody except the Marauders would notice something like that. After all, the students of Hogwarts had been used to see Remus walk down the corridors with unexplainable scratches on his body. Pressing his fingertips to his cheek, he felt the roundness of the puffy area and a sting of pain shoot through him. Remus knew that he wouldn't be able to attend his next class, Potions, with the Marauders. He could tell Headmaster Dumbledore? No, he didn't want to appear weak.

"Do you have any idea about what might have happened to, Remus? The royal Professor Fitzgerald has been sitting at the staff table for the nearly fifteen minutes, and still there has been no sign of Remus. You don't think that something might have happened to him, do you?" James held onto his fork that had a piece of steak hanging from it, but he made no move to try and eat it. Sirius, who had been staring at his bowl of mashed potatoes, nodded his agreement while Peter Pettigrew ate noisily.

"We should go search for him." Sirius stood up from his seat, pushing the bowls of food aside, and throwing Peter a disgusted look. James had been the only other Marauder to follow Sirius out of the Great Hall and down the twisting corridors. Sirius led the way towards the Hospital Wing, hoping that Remus had not ended up being sent there.

"There has been nobody in the Hospital Wing today. Now, will you please leave."

James wanted to search around the West Tower, in case Remus went to send to a letter by school owl. There had been no luck there either. Sirius went off towards the moving staircases that led towards the Library, where Remus had been known to spend hours while losing track of time. James went down the corridors leading towards the Kitchens. Sirius darted down the passageways that led towards the Charms classroom while James headed into the area by the Quidditch Pitch. Still, there had been no sighting of Remus and they were running out of time before classes. Finally, James decided that the only place they haven't looked was the Gryffindor Commonroom.

Remus was sitting on the edge of a chair beside the fire place when James and Sirius stumbled in. He was wearing a black T-shirt with a band slogan across it and a pair of tan pants, his school robes tossed onto another chair. Remus Lupin skiving off a class?

"What happened to your face?" James said, advancing towards his friend with a pleading look in his hazel eyes. Sirius didn't know what he wanted to say, but he also didn't want to stand there looking like a prat.

"The full moon is in a couple of days, and without thinking of anything else I went straight into a wall and hit my face. You know, I'm not feeling that well to attend classes today." Remus muttered his answer under his breath, his eyes staring blankly into the fireplace.

"When you feel better we will help you with your make up lessons." James said, knowing that they had to go to class so that Remus could copy their notes. James knew that school work was important to Remus, and he didn't want his friend to fail because he wanted to skip class to. Sirius remained in his spot, noticing how the fire light created lines on Remus' premature face and the amount of gray reflecting his hair.

"We will actually try and take as much notes as possible, if you are willing to believe that." Sirius joked, hoping to get Remus to crack a smile but his friend still sat sadly in his chair.

"Do you want us to stay with you?" James Potter asked, fixing his glasses that were sliding down the bridge of his nose.

"No, you better head off to class before you get in trouble." Remus breathed, leaning back in his chair in the same way that he did whenever he felt too weak to move. He closed his eyes before James and Sirius left the commonroom.

i "Do you care to tell me how you got that nasty cut on your neck?" a sweet sounding voice floated from the back of his mind, as calm as a running trail of honey. /I Remus stirred in his seat but would not allow himself to wake up.

i "You should tell the nice nurse what happened to you. There is no need for you to be worried." /i Remus could hear the voice of the man as if he was standing right next to him all over again.

i " I was playing in my bedroom with one of my toys and I fell on a piece of glass from something I was trying to fix." his own child like voice answered. /i 

i "I promise you that nobody is going to hurt you ever again if you please answer the question with the truth." the voice of the nurse said, pleading with the same calmness. /i 

i "I'm not lying. It was an accident." his voice answered back. He must not have been more than seven years old at the time /i Remus opened his eyes and stared at the fireplace once more.

"I'm just going to go on drowning in these memories." he whispered in case somebody might have come up to the commonroom


End file.
